nicholasdigenova:

“Cordyseps Toad”, ink and animation paint on mylar, 24” x 24”, 2011

hookersorcake:

Dick: How was the flight?

Jane:The bathroom in first class had a malfunction and it tore out some guys rectum.

Dick: Wow! That would really suck.

Jane: Yeah the guy was screaming and there was blood everywhere. So needless to say, the bathroom was out of order.

Dick: Yeah, I guess so.

Jane: Well anyway, I had to pee for like the last three hours so I ended up just crossing my legs and squeezing really hard to not pee myself and I think I had an orgasm.

Dick: Really?  On the plane? In your seat?

Jane: Yeah. Actually I know I had an orgasm and so then I totally pissed myself.

Dick: No kidding? That happened to me once.

Jane: Really? You squeezed your thighs together for so long and hard you came?! And peed yourself.

Dick: No, I actually shat myself on a greyhound bus outside of Denver.

Jane: And you ejaculated?

Dick: No, I just shit myself. I was reading some new age book about the secret dream life of trees and I had the sudden realization that I was everything and I didn’t need to do anything. I just was. And I began to laugh and cry so hard I shit myself.

Jane: Sounds more like a nervous breakdown.

Dick: No. It was totally cool. Like I was just a human being who had soiled himself. No one seemed to really care. I felt great.